Throwback to February 25, 20114

1. Make him/her shred the mountain of receipts I have now that I have finished filing taxes and FAFSA, but the shredding would have to be done with his/her teeth.

2. Make him/her walk from Georgia to my home, while carrying bags of pennies in the amount he/she tried to steal from me.

3. Make him/her hold his/her breath for the amount of time it took me to unscramble this mess with several very kind bank representatives.

4. Make him/her call My Mother to ‘fess up to what he/she did, and then listen while My Mother gives the talk about how his/her life could have been better if only he/she had listened to the sage advice of mothers, who after all only criticize you for your own good.

5. In-house arrest at WalMart, preferably behind the customer service desk.