My mom passed away a little less than a month ago. She was almost 97 1/2, and definitely the oldest person I have ever known. The last several years were tough–she was almost always unhappy and uncomfortable.

This is a tough one to write, and I don’t mean this as a eulogy. I am still processing, and I expect I will post more about my mom in the months to come.

I am now officially the Matriarch of the Family, and wondering what my legacy will be. My mother took up oil painting as a hobby when she turned 50. (That’s one of her paintings in the photo.) I am now in search of a cool new hobby that I can take up in retirement. Hmmm.

Mama always had some sort of alcohol in the house, in case friends dropped in. (They did.) She didn’t drink, except for tiny sips of sweet wine or even cognac occasionally. She did, however, believe in home remedies that did use alcohol. I remember coming home from college one Christmas break. I had a horrible cold and residual tummy spasms from the stress of exams. Mama mixed some homemade berry syrup with Polish spirytus —192 proof and that is not a typo!–and offered me a small crystal glass of this “handcrafted” cordial. I slept on the couch for hours and felt remarkably better.

Mama also believed in the curative powers of rubbing alcohol, hydrogen peroxide, and vinegar, as well as in (the slightly more potable) Valerian root tea. She also loved chamomile. She’d buy the dried blossoms, and sometimes the tea bags, and would insist upon it for a variety of ailments. I drank plain chamomile tea when I had a stomach ache. Honey and lemon were added when I was coughing. When I was congested, she’d put the hot tea in a big bowl, and I’d cover my head with a towel and just inhale the steam. And when Mama recognized that my blonde hair wasn’t looking sun-kissed, she had me rinsing my locks with cool chamomile tea. To this very day, there is chamomile in my cupboard.

For tonight’s drink, I actually found a bonafide cocktail recipe using chamomile tea, honey, and lemon. And it actually tasted real good, too–not too potent, either, so Mama would probably sip on it if it were lukewarm.

Combine 1/2 ounce honey with 1/2 ounce boiling water until honey dissolves. Add 1 ounce rye whiskey, 1 ounce honey bourbon (like Wild Turkey American Honey), 1 ounce fresh lemon juice, and 1 cup chilled chamomile tea. Garnish with lemon, and don’t add ice. Na zdrowie!

Enjoyed: Sunday, April 2, 2023

Listed on the menu: No, but the bar boasted of its whiskey collection and creative–yet classy–cocktails, so making an Old Fashioned was not a burden. The bartender at first suggested bourbon, but I wanted an Irish whiskey while in Ireland.

Ingredients: Jameson Select Black Barrel Irish whiskey, Aperol, simple syrup, twist of orange peel.

The occasion: On our first full day in Dublin, we started with a crammed itinerary: full Irish breakfast, Trinity College, the Book of Kells, the Irish Whiskey Museum, and Christ Church Cathedral. We had afternoon tea at the Shelbourne Hotel booked for 5 pm, but we purposely arrived early, to scope out the historic hotel (where the Irish Constitution was drafted in 1922) and to visit the iconic Horseshoe Bar, which opened at 4 pm. We were the first patrons, and the handsome bartenders gave us their full attention. Husband wisely selected the El Greco Madness (Redbreast 12 whiskey, Aperol, Cocoa Vermouth made in house, orange bitters, and nutmeg) which was recently featured in Wine Enthusiast magazine. (The tea ended up being marvelous, by the way. So much care went into every little canape and every dessert item.)

My rating: **** out of 5. The Aperol was an interesting substitute for bitters, which together with the orange oil from the peel, gave the spicy whiskey a decidedly citrus note. The drink was not too sweet nor too bitter, with no muddled fruit in sight, so better to enjoy the gorgeous amber color.

Final thoughts: The Horseshoe Bar has hosted many famous people (like Pavarotti and the Rolling Stones), as well as a multitude of Ireland’s politicians, musicians, and authors, so that gave me a little thrill. The bar’s entrance is tucked off the main lobby, with only a little sign to label it. The horseshoe-shaped marble counter, the crimson couches, and the dim lighting all add to the glamour. There are no TV screens here, no piped in music, and no food: the focus is on the the drinks and the conversation, as it should be.

She said “yes”! Yesterday morning, Oldest Child sent a message to the family group chat: he had a life update. We knew he had the engagement ring, but we didn’t know when he would formally pop the question. Apparently he wanted to wait for a sunny day and a secluded spot on a waterway in the woods. Sounds romantic, private, and fitting for this remarkable couple. Later last night, the celebration continued with a gourmet dinner at a fancy restaurant in Nashville.

I have not stopped smiling. Husband and I are delighted to soon have another daughter. Our hearts are filled with joy!

As a dear friend said to me last night when I shared this news, “The circle of life continues.” Indeed. This special couple is starting a new chapter of life. Husband and I are looking forward to closing the “career” chapters of our lives, but as our recent trip to Ireland demonstrated, we still have the energy for new adventures. We still have hopes and dreams!

She said “yes”! The diamond ring is so pretty, but their obvious love is even more beautiful.

Tonight’s cocktail is my version of the “Diamond Martini”. Place vodka (the best is Polish, and today I used Chopin) and a stemmed glass in the freezer well ahead of time. Combine 2 ounces of vodka with 1/4 teaspoon of dry vermouth and gently pour into the frosty glass. Twist a piece of lemon peel over the drink, wipe the peel over the rim of the glass, and then drop the peel in. Sto lat!

Earlier this week, as I was waiting for my car window to be repaired (great job by Safelite, by the way), another customer started to chat with me. Turned out that he was a recently-retired teacher from Loudoun County, and he wanted to give me advice, based on his experiences. He told me he loved being retired, but that he was not prepared for his also-retired wife always being underfoot. So he suggested that Husband and I take up separate hobbies that get us out of the house, and that we consider part-time employment. Too much togetherness was not a good thing, he emphasized. I pointed out that during the Covid lockdown, Husband and I did pursue separate hobbies in separate areas of the house for several hours of the day, so we have some practice in respecting each other’s boundaries.

Based on how eager this dude was to talk to a stranger, I wonder if he is spending any time at all with his spouse. I don’t want to be like him.

Tonight’s cocktail, my version of a Vermouth Cassis, has a lower alcohol content that most of my preferred drinks, and manages to be interesting and refreshing.

In a tall glass, combine 3 ounces dry vermouth with 1 ounce crème de cassis. Add several ice cubes, and about 3 ounces club soda.

Yesterday, we visited Gainfully Employed Son #2 for an early celebration of the end of his 26th year on Earth. He opened his wallet and withdrew his new insurance card. HIS new insurance card! A card listing policy numbers for medical, dental, AND vision coverage! And most importantly–a card that did not have the names of myself or his father on it. His own card!

And so it ends, it at long last ends: Birthday number 26, thanks to The Affordable Care Act, means Husband and I no longer have any financial obligations to any of our offspring. Now it’s just the two of us!

Metaphorically speaking, this pushes the baby bird completely out of the nest. But he has been flying confidently for a few years now, he’s building his own nest, and we know his future is bright and sunny.

Tonight’s cocktail is my version of a “Dark and Stormy” since I like irony. Combine 1/2 ounce or more of lime juice with 6 ounces of (non-alcoholic) ginger beer in a tall glass. Add ice. Slowly pour in 2 ounces of dark rum or a similar cane-based liquor. Admire the “stormy” effect, then stir and enjoy.

Time to embark on the prologue to my next chapter in life. Time to start a countdown, as I seek to fill the remaining months with meaning and fulfillment, a prelude to enjoying my golden years.

Time to booze it up, because these days are going to crawl by.

Time to start another set of blogs.

Husband and I have decided that we are both retiring in the summer of 2024, when we both hit the glorious age of 62. We refuse to be deterred by the sluggish performance of our stock portfolio, or by all the financial advice columnists who tell us to work as long as we can.

Nope. Life is short. We need to have time to savor it.

This week at work was tough for me. My high school students have spring fever already, and I caught several of them in boldfaced lies. Does it say “born yesterday” on my forehead? Or “new to this job”? Or “never parented teenagers of my own”? Or “never actually was a teenager”? Yeah, give me a break.

And Tuesday was 3/14, or Pi/Pie Day, and for the first time in years, not a single student from the Math Honor Society offered to bring me a piece of pie, even though I saw carts filled with pie slices and multitudes shoving the aforementioned slices into their–do I dare say it?–pie-holes.

So yeah, I am salty today. Thank goodness tomorrow is a teacher workday and I don’t have to face the kiddos.

Tonight’s cocktail, therefore, is my version of a Salty Dog.

Stir together 2 ounces dry gin, 4 ounces pink grapefruit juice, 1/2 ounce simple syrup, and a slice of lime.

Pour into a salt-rimmed glass and add ice cubes.

Enjoyed: Sunday, March 12, 2023

Listed on the menu: Not on the brunch menu, but I found it on the cocktail menu as “House Old Fashioned”.

Ingredients: Bulleit rye whiskey, malted barley syrup, angostura, orange bitters, Luxardo cherry, orange garnish.

The occasion: Sometimes, the best things in life are those closest to home. And the best company to keep? People you’ve known for decades. On this particular Sunday, we joined four of our dearest friends for brunch on the Charlottesville Downtown Mall. We followed our lovely meal with a stop at Rockfish Brewing Company, just a few blocks away, to continue our conversations.

My rating: **** out of 5. The cocktail was sweeter than I expected, likely because of a heavy dose of the molasses-like malted barley syrup. Yet the syrup did give the drink a distinct flavor, which complemented the eggs, pork, tomato, and potato of my meal. I would order it again for brunch, but maybe not with a more savory supper entree.

Final thoughts: It snowed! Yes, Charlottesville–the first we have seen all season! None of the big, wet flakes stuck to the roadways, happily, but we really enjoyed watching them fall from the sky and land on us as we walked the mall.

Enjoyed: Sunday, March 5, 2023

Listed on the menu: Not really. The vivacious bartender (“I’m a New Yorker, and we work hard!”) told me she made delicious Old Fashioneds which were different from the ingredients listed on the menu, so I told her to create one for me.

Ingredients: Bulleit rye, simple syrup, bitters, muddled orange, muddled maraschino cherries. Bartender said that muddled orange was essential.

The occasion: I was returning home from a five day visit with my mom in northwest Indiana. The trip was last-minute and overdue, and I was happy to be there with her, even though she didn’t recognize me at first. Other than the shared meals with my sister and her family, there were few bright moments. Life is hard, and aging is cruel.

My rating: *** out of 5. The cocktail was satisfying and exactly what a “traditional” Old Fashioned should be, especially since this was a busy airport bar.

Final thoughts: As I raised my glass, in my mind, I toasted the hospice workers and the nursing home staff who are taking care of my mother and making her comfortable. I am in awe of what they do, day to day, and I am grateful.

1. Led Zeppelin or Def Leppard or Nirvana tee-shirts. Yes, the music is timeless, but find your own bands, kiddos! Do you even know what vinyl records are?
2. Face masks resting under noses or slung below chins. Just what good are those masks doing, anyhow? What kind of messages are they sending?
3. Mega-large fake eyelashes. Can these young ladies see their friends from behind these dense lashes? See their teachers? Their classwork? Their phones? (OK, maybe it’s OK if they can’t see their phones.)
4. Crocs. When you are so young, why not choose style over comfort?
5. Crocs with “charms” to decorate them. No, just no. No.
6. Jeans with multiple rips and holes and missing fabric. Why bother? Why not just wear shorts?
7. Pajama pants. Yes, I get that they are cozy and warm (heck, anything’s got to be warmer than those ripped jeans) but those should be a treat to look forward to at the end of a long day. Keep those at home!
8. Belly-button jewelry. Those fake diamonds in the navel look cheap and tacky, and yet I always notice them, a great example of the human phenomenon of not being able to pull our eyes away from tragedies.
9. Tank tops that are cut high enough to show off the aforementioned jewelry. But now that I think about it, maybe it’s better for the eyes to be drawn to the navel after all, versus being drawn to cleavage exposed by the tank tops.
10. Fishnet stockings. Too sexy for school, and (most) high schoolers don’t yet have the poise and swagger to be sexy.

Enjoyed: Saturday, December 10, 2022

Listed on the menu: Yes, as “Fireside Old Fashioned”.

Ingredients: Maker’s Mark, cocoa bitters, maple syrup, fresh grapefruit.

The occasion: Our annual “Christmas Date Weekend” continued with a meal at the Hotel Roanoke, built in 1882 and listed on the National Register of Historic Places, and therefore the most iconic hotel in the city. We had seen its Tudor grandness from the road, but this was the first time we visited. The lobbies and common areas were lushly decorated for the holidays, and so many families were strolling around. Happily, I had made reservations weeks in advance at the very-proper Regency Room, so a table was waiting. We were right next to the jazz trio and the dance floor and we did not mind at all. Supper was so delicious but the best treat was my “Snow Globe” dessert in a glass.

My rating: ***** out of 5. I love cocoa and maple flavors, as well as Maker’s Mark, but I wondered how fresh grapefruit would work in this drink. I suspect only a splash of the juice was added. Turns out, all the ingredients were carefully balanced into a rainbow of flavors–some bitter, some sweet, some refreshingly sour.

Final thoughts: The word “Fireside” in the name did not mean smoke was added, but likely meant that this concoction should be enjoyed in winter, in a cozy spot for two. Although the hotel and restaurant were very crowded on this particular Saturday night, our intimate table for two, the dim lighting, the gourmet meal, and the merry live music made for a very romantic evening.