Throwback to September 21-22, 2012

1. Girl: sends me at least one text or FB message a day. Boy: sends me one text or FB message a week.

2. Girl: immediately sends a thank-you text for the small gift I mailed her. Boy: sends a thank-you text for the small gift I mailed him only after I inquire as to whether he received the gift.

3. Boy: handles personal finances adeptly. Girl: asks “where does my signature go on the check?”

4. Boy: receives organic produce regularly from nearest CSA. Girl: Frequent patron at I-Crou-Cane-Hop, campus haven for fast food bliss.

5. Boy: posts pointed social commentary and introspective musings on FB. Girl: posts links to indie rock bands and photos of the cutest-ever baby pot-bellied pigs.

6. Girl: best friends are a group of energetic, fun, yet hard-working females. Boy: best friends are a a group of energetic, fun, yet hard-working females.

7. Girl: complains that her budget does not allow her to buy more clothes. Boy: complains that his budget does not allow him to buy more cocktails.

8. Over fall break, College Boy brought home a few articles to read. College Girl brought home large corrugated cardboard pyramids to spray paint.

9. Over fall break, College Girl drove as much as possible because she missed her car so much. College Boy (who does have his own car on campus) parked his car and let the parents do all the driving so he could save gas money.

10. Over fall break, both slept alot.

11. Both have mailed their completed absentee ballots for the November election.

12. College Boy saw the President of the United States at a rally in Richmond last year. College Girl saw the President of the United States at a rally in Richmond today. (October 25, 2012)

Throwback to September 4 and 26, 2014

1. “I barely got any sleep last night, and yet I don’t feel tired at all.” (I wanted to scream, “Just wait until you are a young mom! Or my age!” but that would have been super-unprofessional.)

2. (Yesterday was 1950s Day) Female student in a poodle skirt: “I miss my shorts! Can you imagine what it must be like to wear a skirt every day?”

3. “May I just take a picture of the board instead of copying it all down?”

Throwback to October 6, 2012

1. I let him to play selections from his I-Pod over the car stereo–dubstep, anyone?

2. I likewise eat a Nutella and bacon sandwich for lunch.

Throwback to October 5, 2014

1. She can buy her dad a shot of bourbon the next time he comes to visit.

2. She can go on a Virginia winery tour with her mom.

3. She can buy her big brother a few bottles of vodka in gratitude for all he’s done for her.

4. She can buy beer for her little brother once he is in college but of course this is all hypothetical because he will be one of those college boys who never touches the stuff and she would never think of corrupting him.

Throwback to October 1, 2013

1. At least Furloughed Husband (FH) can sleep in now and get over his jet lag.

2. Smaller income means a smaller income tax bill.

3. Smaller income means a smaller retirement fund means we will have to move in with one of our kids even sooner into our golden years than we expected!

4. We can borrow money from Gainfully Employed Son and so lessen his guilt about all the money he cost us by attending a private college.

5. FH now has time to complete many items on the Honey-Do list.

6. FH now has time to help Youngest Child with chemistry homework.

7. Fewer commutes to work = lower gas bill + bonus points for keeping the air around town cleaner.

8. My self-esteem is getting a big boost, since now I am the primary breadwinner.

Throwback to September 26, 2013, when Husband was away on business in Australia

1. I am using his favorite mug.

2. I am using his pillow.

3. I am not yet using his toothbrush although the thought did cross my mind.

4. I have grown to be very comfortable in the smack dab middle of the bed.

5. I have called his office on the flimsiest pretense, just to see if the administrative assistant heard from him today (she hadn’t).

6. The default clock on my I Pad is set for Sydney time.

7. I have stopped cooking, and I don’t mind having Trader Joe wraps for supper.

8. Youngest Child is always hungry, since I have stopped cooking and there are no leftovers and he doesn’t care for Trader Joe wraps.

9. I planned the “welcome home” feast even before Husband left the airport.

10. I looked for Vegemite at Kroger. They were out. (And seriously, who is buying that stuff?)

11. My earworm is “Down Under” by Men at Work.

12. I have consumed a disproportionate amount of chocolate.

13. Even pumpkin-spiced lattes don’t taste good when my baby’s not around. Without him, my world is “upside down.”

14. No one is here to stop me from writing sentimental drivel.

Throwback to September 22, 2015, when my morning duty at the high school included monitoring the drop-off lane.

1. Use a hammer to smash the phone of every parent who uses his/her phone while driving in this area.

2. Mandate that above-mentioned parents hold a conversation with their offspring– seated in the car–versus someone on the other end of the phone.

3. Use a sledgehammer to smash the windshields of drivers who honk at school buses.

4. Mandate that above-mentioned “honkers” pass the tests necessary to become a school bus driver.

5. Use a paint-ball gun to splatter a myriad of colors onto the cars of drivers in this area who speed, make U-turns, and do not use turn signals.

6. Mandate that above-mentioned drivers take Behind The Wheel classes alongside high school students.

7. Use an extra-large can of scarlet-red spray paint to mark an “F” (for “Fool”) on the hoods of the cars of parents who drop their children off in the right-hand turn lanes, versus designated drop-off lanes.

8. Mandate that the above-mentioned Fools write reflective essays about the value of their children’s safety versus the value of being on-time for work.

9. Use a gigantic, ear-drum-popping megaphone to yell at drivers who do not yield to student pedestrians, most of whom are using a cross-walk.

10. Mandate that above-mentioned “non-yielders” spend every rainy day of the school year acting as crossing guards while wearing neon outfits which are non-waterproof and itchy. #angermanagementissues #safetyfirst

Tuesday, October 6, 2020

Make mine a double! Today’s cocktail is appropriate for two current events.

1. For the past several days, I have felt like banging my head against the wall over all the utter stupidity and egocentrism displayed by the White House’s current inhabitant. No regard for science, no regard for the safety of people around him, no regard for the over 207,000 Americans that have died of CoVid-19 so far. Please, America, keep wearing your masks and keep a decent physical distance away from strangers! Please! I am already several sips into my cocktails as I write this, so I need to let it go for tonight and relax. (I am sure the White House will provide more reasons to bang my head against the wall come tomorrow morning. Vote, everyone, please vote.)
2. We heard a short time ago that rock legend/ supreme guitarist Eddie Van Halen has died. Forlorn Husband is blasting Eddie’s music even as I type this. Eddie may have been labeled a “head banger” by some, but he was a musical genius. May he rest in peace.

Today’s drink is my version of the Head Banger Cocktail. In a shaker half-filled with ice, combine 1 1/2 ounces Tennessee whiskey (I used the rye whiskey that we purchased 2 weekends ago at Tennessee Hills Distillery in Jonesborough, TN), 1 1/2 ounces peach brandy, and several drops of bitters (I used craft bitters that are a blend of oak and hibiscus). Shake well, and strain into an Old Fashioned glass.

September 21, 2020

1. An old dog can be taught new tricks, because I can now use Zoom–and many of its features– with confidence.
2. However, I still am old-fashioned enough to want to keep a binder at the ready, since I like to jot down notes on paper as I am speaking with individual students.
3. I am vain about my appearance, because I will never attend a Zoom meeting without fixing my hair and applying a touch of makeup, and maybe even putting on a pair of earrings.
4. I am really enjoying wearing pants with elastic waistbands all day long.
5. I am really enjoying not wearing shoes all day long.
6. Even though the kitchen is steps away, my goal of starting to prepare dinner during my breaks from work is rarely going to happen.
7. I can get very easily annoyed with members of my household who ask me why I haven’t started to prepare dinner during my breaks from work.
8. I can get very easily annoyed with members of my household who ask me to assist them (“Can you wash out my water bottle?” “Have you seen the sewing kit?”) while I am working.  Clearly, having me available at their beck and call during the first several months of quarantine has now spoiled them rotten.
9. I can get easily distracted by birds and squirrels. Serves me right for setting up my desk right beneath a window that faces the backyard.
10. And speaking of the backyard–I realized that I really like attending virtual faculty meetings from the comfort of my deck. 
11. I am often overwhelmed by the vast number of tabs open on my laptop. 
12. Even though we are meeting virtually, I am still pretty good at putting an end to mischievous behavior of my students. For example, Instead of gasping in horror at the PBR beer can clutched in the hand of a young man, I just coolly and calmly asked him to move the can offscreen, and he complied.
13. When a student tells me that he didn’t join the Zoom meeting because he was out with friends, I am capable of holding my tongue and not scolding him for not making school a priority.
14. When a student tells me that he didn’t turn in any work for the past several days because he was at the beach with his family, I am capable of holding my tongue and not scolding his parents for not making school a priority.  (OK, OK, full disclosure: I wish I were at the beach, too.)
15. I really don’t need to project my formidable voice during a Zoom meeting.  It’s not a classroom, is it? There’s not a back row anymore, just screens, and my laptop microphone is remarkably sensitive. Old habits die hard.
16. I miss my fellow staff members, and believe it or not, I miss teenagers.

Throwback to September 4, 2015

1. Labor Day Weekend.

2. Charlottesville Women’s 4 Miler Weekend (Go, Pink Ladies! Save the Ta-Tas!)

3. Three Days Off From Work And Boy, Do We Need Them!

4. Last Chance to Wear White Shoes Until Next Spring.

5. Retailers Roll Out Sales and All Their Halloween Stock.

6. End of the Summer Vacation Season.

7. First Performance of the Christopher Newport University Marching Captains at the First Home Football Game of the Year.

8. First Time In Twenty-Four Days (But Who’s Counting?) That I Can Hug College Boy 2.0 (My Baby! My Son! My Sweet Pippy!).