Thursday, March 19, 2020

The classic Gin and IT cocktail (I do believe the IT stands for Italy, home of sweet vermouth) calls for 1 1/2 ounces of gin, 1 1/2 ounces sweet vermouth, and a dash of citrus bitters.  (I actually made it with grapefruit bitters.) Stir with ice, and strain into a glass with fresh ice.  This cocktail was popular as early as the 1880s, and was called a Sweet Martini.

Cheers to my Italian and Polish friends, celebrating tonight at home.  St. Joseph is a favorite of both cultures, and many communities celebrate with parades and parties, and by “the wearing of the red,” since red is found in both the Italian and the Polish flag.  My salute comes in the form of a red swizzle stick and a red sweatshirt that I wore while “working” at home.  The cocktail looked good next to my laptop.

Wednesday, March 18, 2020

Frozen banana, almond milk, splash of vanilla vodka, teaspoon of Stevia, and nutmeg.

I consider myself to be frugal, and I hate the idea of throwing out over-ripe bananas.  As a result, there are always frozen bananas to be found in our spare freezer.  When I remember, I pop one into a breakfast smoothie, but today, I needed a creamy treat a bit later in the afternoon, so this spiked smoothie was born.

I think the vanilla vodka added an extra layer of flavor, as did the nutmeg.  Since the almond milk was unsweetened, I added a spoon of Stevia, but sugar may have worked better.  This drink went down very easily on a day when I felt everything around me was off-kilter and everyone was going bananas.

Tuesday, March 17, 2020

Because it’s St. Patrick’s Day!

Matcha-Gotcha is lightly-sweetened matcha iced tea with Jim Beam American Honey whiskey.   I mixed 1 part whisky to 2 parts tea, and I rimmed the glass with green sugar crystals.   If using regular whisky, I would add a spoonful of honey syrup–just dissolve a spoon of honey into hot water.

The drink in the middle is a cheater’s version of the mint julep.  We had some mint julep syrup in the refrigerator, so Husband mixed that with some Maker’s Mark bourbon and popped it into an ice-filled green metal glass.

And finally, Son chose to have a Guinness, in memory of a St. Patrick’s Day that he celebrated in Dublin, Ireland.

And may the strength of three be in your journey. Sláinte’.

Monday, March 16, 2020

Less than 10 ounces of Helles in the Tropics by Sierra Nevada. And I know it’s beer, but I wanted to change things up.  Today Mr. Trump asked Americans to gather in groups of no more than 10, so we can slow the spread of the virus.  I am skeptical that this will work, and wondering how this will be enforced.  I am content to be a group of 3 here at home–Husband, Youngest Son, and me.

I picked the Helles out of the basement refrigerator because the first thing that caught my eye was the H-E-L-L on the label.  Sigh.  And we have only just started battling this pandemic.

Regardless of the name, the beer was indeed tasty, and brought back a pleasant memory of our spring break 2018 tour of the fancy Sierra Nevada brewery and factory outside of Ashville, North Carolina.  I strongly suspect that this year’s spring break ain’t happening.  Yikes, I had better cancel the hotel reservations.

Sunday, March 15, 2020

Blue Bee Cider Hopsap Shandy with a splash of grenadine.   I filled a tall flute with the cider and drizzled several drops of grenadine into it.  I was hoping the grenadine would float to the bottom and make a pretty progression of colors, but the fizzy cider wasn’t cooperating, and the colors blended too quickly.  Since my daughter works for Blue Bee Cider in Richmond, Virginia, I always have a few bottles on hand.  The Hopsap Shandy is dry, and no, the hops do not make it taste like beer.

Since today is the Ides of March (Beware!  Will CoVid bring our doom?), I made this drink in honor of Caesar.  The orange do-hickey on top is the closest thing to a dagger I could find in the house.  Do you like the little drops of grenadine that (may) look like blood?

Saturday, March 14, 2020

Swedish glog with Polish vodka.  About 1 ounce vodka to 2 ounces of glog, and garnished with an orange slice.  Only Polish-made vodka is allowed to enter our house.  The glog is left over from a bottle I purchased at IKEA, so that was super-convenient.  I shook this over ice cubes and strained it, because I wanted it cold but not watered down.

Yes, alcohol will be serving as a physical balm for me in the weeks ahead.  And since both Poland and Sweden border the Baltic, I had to name this the Baltic Balm.

Friday, March 13, 2020

Coffee liqueur and unsweetened almond milk as an after-dinner drink.   One to one ratio, over ice if you like it colder.  I have become intolerant of the lactose in milk, so unsweetened almond milk is my chosen substitute.  We purchased this coffee liqueur on our “Bourbon Trail” jaunt through central Kentucky.

And yes, I feel our national leaders are not understanding the magnitude of this pandemic, and that they are trying to reassure us–and the business world–with their SILKY LIES.

And it has not escaped my notice that today is Friday the Thirteenth.  So fitting.

1.  I have not seen the movie.
2. I have not read the book, either.
3. My mother easily gets jealous if I stop paying attention to her, so I try to not engage her roommate in extended conversation.
4. I don’t want to discuss anything even remotely related to sex while my mom is in the same room.   I have been married for 30-plus years, and I am still waiting for the “birds and bees” talk, for that matter.
5. Roommate had already informed me, earlier in the day,  that “Michael Buble is hot.”  While I do heartily agree (sigh…), I suspect 80-plus year old Roommate has few filters and I am too scared to test her limits.
6. And even earlier in the day, Mother was completing a word search puzzle with a “construction” theme, and she asked me–in Polish– what the English word “erection” meant.  I needed a deep breath before I answered, so Mother asked again, even more loudly. (“Co to znaczy, erection? Nie znam te słowo, erection.”)  I finally explained what the word meant from a construction point of view, but I couldn’t help but wonder if the nursing staff overheard.  Not risking further mortification!  What must they think of us!
7. Since Mother is hard of hearing, she often asks for me to repeat back to her–in Polish–what people are saying.  I would have to translate, therefore, all our possible discussion about Mr. Grey’s behavior. I do not know the Polish words for “bondage” and “submission” and such–but what if I discovered that Mother did know the terms?  Could. Not. Handle. That.
8. It was late in the afternoon, and I had not started drinking.  Yet.

2015 vs 2019

1. We will be in a hotel room while he dresses for the ceremony, so I will not be able to select his clothes and iron his gown. (“Take the gown out of the package and hang it near the shower to get the wrinkles out.”)
2. I will be able to blame my tears on the pollen and the pollen alone, since the ceremony is scheduled to be outdoors.
3. I am not going to worry about finding $100,000 or so to finance his university education. (“All that tuition money, and they still want a hundred bucks for a polyester gown?”)
4. I am not going to worry about whether he will succeed in college without his mom’s daily presence.  (“Did you or did you not remember to hang up the gown?”)
5. I am not going to worry about whether he will fit in, or will make friends, or will find activities and classes that speak to his passions.
6. I am going to worry about his next stage of life, once his summer commitments are over, and about just how far away from home he will be.
7. I won’t be impatient with families who cheer loudly, because this time that family may be ours.  (“Wooooooo! That’s our son, the one in the wrinkled gown!”)
8. Son will be able to legally drink an alcoholic beverage (or two) as we toast his successes and chuckle about the times we doubted him.
9. Instead of asking my older children to offer the graduate some advice on college life, I will ask my older children to offer some advice on real life.
10. I will make the graduate pose for many photos in many campus locations, because by now he ought not to be embarrassed by his mom’s sentimental expectations.
11. I will have to retire my favorite expression, the one I have been using whenever Son exasperated me:  “Your life?  Honey, we pay for your life.”

1. “Stop cussing.  It’s impolite and inappropriate for school. I don’t care if everyone else is doing it.”

2. “Other modifiers besides the word ‘f***ing’ are available. Maybe if you paid attention in English class, you would learn about the beauty of our language and build a wide vocabulary.”

3. “And speaking of English class…two negatives make a positive.  ‘Anymore’ is the correct choice for this sentence, as in ‘No one likes to come to school anymore.'”

4. “Do you dislike school because of people like me who are always eager to correct your grammar?”

5. “Just deal with it, you entitled brat.  Do you think your generation is the first to dislike school? Disliking school is an age-old tradition.  That’s why truant officers were created.”

6. “Just deal with it, you spoiled brat.  Just wait until you are an adult with a demanding boss and a forty-plus hour work week and mouths at home to feed and bills to pay and so on. School is easy by comparison.”

7. “Maybe it’s your attitude.  Perhaps if you and your fellow students were more pleasant to each other and to your teachers, the mood in the classrooms would improve.  Send out some positive vibes for a change!”

8. “Spring break is almost here.  Be patient, Young One!”